I have noticed my depression slowly sneaking up on me, I had e-mailed the new psychiatrist last week about my sleep troubles (he told me to e-mail him if I needed anything) and nothing. I called this morning and left a very detailed message about I could feel my depression coming on, I know my signs and that I had already e-mailed him. Again, nothing.
So I called my old psych's office and spoke with the nurse of my old doctor that managed my psych meds (he isn't an actual psychiatrist but has worked in this field many years and helped me the most when I was faced with my PPD/A, so I trust him), I explained to the nurse what I had done, and how the new doctor had moved all my meds around and that I was slipping. I told her I wanted to come back to them, and I wanted to get off the Xanax if they would help me do it slowly. She put me on hold and then came right back and told me she was calling in refills of my old medicine, to get right back on them the way I was and that he (my old doctor that managed my psych meds) would help me get off the Xanax very slowly, we would drop it 1 mg every two months until we got to the 1 mg and then we'd do that very slowly. He told me to make an appointment to get in with him ASAP and we'd talk more about if we needed to make anymore changes. I got an appointment next Friday. I want to ask him if I should take something like Buspar, something I'd take daily to help prevent anxiety so that it would be easier to get off the Xanax and I will need something to help with my panic/anxiety. I'm also going to ask him if I he would give me some Valium for the beach trip to take only if I felt so panicky that I wanted to up and leave. I think knowing that he would give me that when the times comes, will lift some of the already anxiety I am feeling about the damn beach trip!
But that is why I love this place, it's a mental health clinic with tons of staff. I can always, always, get help when I need it. B told me to go ahead and get him an appointment there and he too would go back there too and just get off the Xanax because it would make it easier for me.
I am ready to get off the Xanax, it's getting harder and harder to get and what if the same thing happens that happened with my pain medicine? I often think about that and how awful those withdrawals would be, I almost certinaly would have to go to a detox center and I don't want that! So it's time.
I feel better already knowing I'm going back on my medicine that had me very stable. I feel good that I'm deciding to get off the Xanax slow and safely and shouldn't withdrawal. I feel good knowing I have this clinic back in my life. AND I'm going back to the next group therapy, not this week but next, yes nahele_101
, you owe me a damn star :p.
Maybe getting my medicine back to normal will also help with my insomnia. I'm trying so hard but sleep is so hard to get at night, but I make myself get up every morning even though I could easily sleep hours longer.
Tomorrow I'm getting up with Ethan (super damn early!) and we are going to have a much needed SB date and run errands. I hope getting up that early and not taking any naps no matter what, will just keep pushing me back to normal sleep.
Sometimes I worry this new pain medicine is messing with my sleep too. Sometimes pain medicine has the opposite effect on me, it makes others sleepy but me wired. I'd much rather stay on this then every put Oxy back in my system though. I also ordered some natural sleep aid off amazon, it is made with Valerian, Chamomile, Passionflower, Lemon Balm, Melatonin and some other natural stuff, it says it is the number 1 best insomnia natural sold supplement on Amazon. I hope I can just use one bottle to help get me back on track.
Maybe after we tackle the Xanx, I can then get off the Ambien. I'd like to be a pill free as possible, I think that is the best. It doesn't even keep me asleep but 3 hours anymore. I've tried many times and failed getting off it though, so I dunno :/.